My Experience of Dissociation

It’s easy to lose touch with ourselves—until a moment of crisis forces us to listen.

I can remember it happening. I was sitting in a meeting with a West End producer, trying to answer questions which I knew I didn’t have the answers to. Months of escalating anxiety culminated in a disassociation experience that left me feeling like an outsider in my own body (and life). It was one of the most frightening moments I’ve ever experienced.

After that meeting, I knew I had to go home. I spoke to my boss and packed my things, fully aware that I wouldn’t be returning. The next day, I visited my doctor, begging him to sign me off. This pivotal moment marked the beginning of my journey toward recognising the importance of listening to our bodies, ultimately inspiring me to create my business, Powerful Pause.

What is Dissociation?

Dissociation is a common response to stress, often serving as a coping mechanism during traumatic events. Many people experience it at some point in their lives. It can manifest in various forms, from feeling detached during a high-pressure situation to losing awareness while absorbed in a book or film.

For me, the feeling of disconnection was a result of ignoring my body’s signals for months. I had confided in a senior colleague who advised me to keep my feelings to myself, which only deepened my sense of isolation and shame. This experience is not uncommon; many individuals learn to dissociate as a way to navigate stress.

The Importance of Listening to Your Body

Ignoring the body’s signals can lead to severe consequences. My experience taught me that our bodies communicate important messages. When I finally paused and sought help, I began to realise the significance of “embodied listening.” This practice helps us reconnect with our physical selves, allowing us to recognise and address our emotional states.

Engaging in simple practices like yoga, meditation, body scans and yoga nidra can foster this connection. These techniques encourage mindfulness and help you tune into your physical sensations. For example, even as I write this, I can feel tightness in my stomach alongside an openness in my heart—both are signals worthy of attention and are inviting me to simply get curious.

Cultivating Embodied Awareness

The more we practice listening to our bodies, the easier it becomes to identify and name our feelings. This process is crucial not just for managing stress but for embracing our entire selves.

It’s essential to create a dialogue with our bodies, acknowledging our struggles and celebrating our strengths. If I’d had an embodied awareness practice back then, I know I would’ve stepped away from that stressful job long before my body forced me to take action. Our bodies are our allies, always looking out for us and guiding us toward what we truly need. By tuning in, we can foster a healthier relationship with ourselves and make choices that honour our well-being.

Conclusion

If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, remember that it’s okay to seek help and take a step back. Pressing pause and cultivating awareness through embodied listening can lead to profound healing and self-discovery. If you’re reading this and struggling right now, please know: it’s totally ok to not feel ok. Whatever anyone else says, your feelings are valid and you matter. You’re not alone on this journey, and it’s never too late to start listening to the wisdom of your body.

If you’d like some support, learn more about one-to-one coaching with me here. My yoga and trauma-informed training means I have the tools and experience to help you safely and mindfully reconnect with your body. Together, we can help you cultivate a deeper relationship with yourself, empowering you to navigate your life with greater ease, awareness and compassion.

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