The Goal of Life Isn’t Happiness (Sorry). It’s Balance
In our quest for happiness, we often forget that life is inherently about balance.
As we dive into Libra season, it’s the perfect time to reflect on one of life’s most essential goals: balance.
Life is a complex tapestry woven from threads of pain, joy, beauty, and sorrow. While it’s easy to focus on the challenges—suffering, decay, and loss—it’s essential to remember the transformative power of balance. Understanding that light and dark, joy and sorrow, coexist can lead us to a richer, more fulfilling life.
In our quest for happiness, we often forget that life is inherently about balance. Concepts like fulfilment and restraint, creation and destruction, and even light and dark are not opposites but essential components of the human experience. Many of these are false binaries; we cannot achieve perfect goodness without acknowledging the necessity of life’s complexities.
Pain as a Teacher
Pain is an inevitable part of life, but it can also be our greatest teacher. It teaches us the depth of love and the importance of empathy. Through pain, we become tender, wise, and more open to the experiences of others. Instead of viewing suffering as a detour, we can recognise it as a part of the main road, guiding us toward deeper understanding and connection. Art has a unique ability to transform our pain into something meaningful. Many of our favourite literary works and musical pieces are born from the depths of despair. They serve as reminders that we’re not alone in our struggles, and that beauty can emerge from even the darkest places.
Embracing the Whole Self
The psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Carl Jung understood that for life to be beautiful, it needed to be whole. He recognised that day and night, chaos and order, and even joy and sorrow are interconnected. Just like a tree that nurtures its roots, we must embrace all aspects of ourselves—both light and dark—to thrive.
The Role of Yoga in Embracing Balance
One of the (many) reasons I love Yoga is that it’s a powerful practice that encourages us to find balance in our bodies and minds. Through mindful movement and breath, yoga invites us to explore the interplay of strength and flexibility, effort and surrender, and light and dark. Each pose teaches us to be present with our feelings, whether they are moments of joy or discomfort. This awareness helps us cultivate acceptance of all aspects of ourselves, fostering a deeper understanding of our dualities. As we practice, we learn to honour our limitations while also celebrating our strengths, ultimately guiding us toward a harmonious existence where we can embrace the full spectrum of life’s experiences.
The Dualities of the Acting Industry
In the acting industry, the interplay of light and dark is particularly pronounced. Actors or performers immerse themselves in intense emotions, navigating a spectrum that ranges from profound joy to deep sorrow. This emotional exploration not only enriches their performances but also reflects the complexities of the human experience. The profession itself also embodies an all-or-nothing nature; actors frequently face periods of unemployment followed by intense bursts of activity where they fully immerse themselves in projects, often working long hours. This cycle can be both exhilarating and exhausting, demanding a delicate balance between vulnerability and self-preservation. Many actors draw on their personal struggles and triumphs to portray authentic characters, creating a powerful connection with audiences. Embracing these dualities allows them to not only tell compelling stories but also to find healing within their craft, illustrating how art and storytelling can be a transformative outlet for exploring life’s highs and lows.
Compassion and Connection
The Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön beautifully stated that “compassion is not a relationship between the wounded and the healed; it’s knowing our darkness well enough to sit in the darkness with others.” This perspective encourages us to use our experiences of pain as pathways to intimacy and connection. When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable, we foster deeper relationships and understanding
Life is a continuous journey of striving for balance amid the dualities we face. By embracing both the broken and the beautiful, we can cultivate a more profound appreciation for our experiences. Remember, it’s in acknowledging and allowing our pain that we can fully embrace joy, creating a richer, more meaningful life.
If you’re looking to find more balance in your life, I can help. Find out more about the one-to-one coaching I offer.
Photo by Vlada Karpovich from Pexels